This is this joke …frequented my sms box these dayz ..
1969`s mom to her son : Beta, apne RELIGION ki ladki se shaadi karna ;
1979’s : Apne caste ki ;
1989’s : Apne level ki ;
1999’s : Apne desh ki ;
2009’s : Koi bhi par *ladki* se hee karna ……..
while this one is meant to be a small joke what startled me was that it captured changes in Indian society really well .
It captured the cultural undercurrents related to marriage in Indian society in shortest possible way .
Debate is on whether article 377 which has just decriminalized sexual freedom is actually of this big significance .
Well if u agree to the way i have worded it then there is nothing to think over .
What the court did in the ruling is simple de-criminalization of sexual freedom .
But that now how the media sold the story and that why it mattered .
Somehow this has become Gay ruling than anything else .
Analyzing the basics …..Post British invasion India has been a socially very diff than the free thinking India we take pride in .
Its just that this has not been well realized by Indian masses and intellectuals alike .
Indians for long has been collectively restrictive and individually liberal society till this time .
What this sentence means in simple term is ….so long u conform to the basic rules …u had the freedom to live the way you wish .
Its during and after colonial rule that we all found ourselves as completely changed society in the form albeit with the same soul …
Be it our standards of being cultured …definition of being civil ….parameters of progress …or agree of liberty .
Its with this un-conscious dual-ism in our thinking the whole debate about 377 becomes significant !!!! .
If you have analyzed the joke above carefully you would realize its contrasting gayz with marriage. This is the dual-ism i am referring to .
While being sexually deviant (gay or otherwise ) is matter of orientation .. being gay or lesbian is about lifestyle .
The india i know would not have much issues with the former .
But the india i know is not prepared for the latter .
And i told u guyz …we were collectively restrictive :…..and individually liberal society 🙂 !!!!
When is say that India isn’t ready for gayz … i don’t really have any probelm with them as such .
Rather its a larger issues than that …. Indians aren’t just ready for “Lifestyle ” culture .
Add to it our confused dual-ism …or if u prefer a simple word … Hippocratic 🙂 .
So long we as country dont really state and stand for what really matters …so long we dont chooze the right over to appropriate …we or anyone for that matter is in for huge shocks in these times ..
I will give a simple example … i was visiting my friend at Jammu last year …he stayed in gandhi nagar or smth like that there .
Being the IT geek …i searched for jammu and this nagar on orkut …and lo ….i came across …
Gandhi nagar sex club with some 3-4 thousand members !! …. now i assume all of these are weak ppl …but theay are 3-4 thousand real ppl …they are part of society .
some jammu gayz and wives and gigolo clubs …and i was wondering …when i landed there ..whether jammuites are aware deep down smth is brewing !!!
… i must admit …i used to think that such things happened in Bangalore only …but Jammu wasn’t a simple place either ….and nor should be rest of india .
oh yes … i wasn’t confident of writing this post at first …….lest my friends connect my late marriage with this article 🙂
As a writer the first thing you learn is to keep your personal thoughts and your intellectual ones separate …what i wasn’t sure whether the readers know of it …..lol
…and as i was making up my mind …i came up with the tag line of collective -restriction….and personally free
…and that made writing this post more compelling .
coming back to the topic … the India ….
we see now is in middle of similar transformation that US went though in the hippies revolution .
Things like article 377 or women reservation bill just make it more evident …
or if you prefer ….a better example … movies like ….Kal ho na ho and dostana make it move than evident …
and no wonder …. i consider karan johar as brilliant show man ….
he just made…with these movies .. ….gayz collectively acceptable…. and that is where the PJ above is so important ..
and you thought Jokes were only of small significance eh ?