There is truth in this line that made me think . The one who loves less rules the relation .
Its represented the practical side of love relationship .
Human relationship were always about power equations . The most obvious is the relations that we have with a co passengers . The most notorious ones are that of deception and deceit .
And the most empowering one …. that of love .
Now that’s a contradiction i made ! if love was all this selfless , empowering and complete experience and relation … then when did a practical side of it got developed .
Rather whats the genesis of this practical side of love and the balance of power in it ?
May be the answer lies in the way love is being developed these days . Hang on , I ain’t saying that love these days is less genuine than it was earlier . Even with the fast life that we live reaching such heights is possible, of course !! .
The problem I feel is from the things that aren’t love . Its the relations and the various shades of it that are being treated as love .
There are always satisfying relations and states of being that are equally liberating as love relation . There is affection , there is attraction , there is intimacy , there is affinity and there is friendship .
Now i wont go on defining all these and i know that everyone is able to differentiate between all these relationships in his own way . Please also note that I did not mention infatuation since i believe it doesn’t exist but its a derogatory term for relations people cannot make sense of .And the best part is its in these relations the power equations are more worldly than love .
Of course its a generalization .
But the point I am making its that apparently our generation has a big burden on its head .
And that’s of falling in love . That’s of being in love relation with something .Its this burden that we color and insist that all other types of close relations that can and do exist between 2 people , be love .
Its this deliberate or inadvertent camouflage that ppl take for love that develops the practical side of love .
Love for once … grows , the speed can vary for people but the steady growth which lasts life long is the main charecteretics of love when compared to other relations .
And with all the fairness each relation has it own growth cycle .And this cycle goes for a toss when the people are in hurry to fall in relations . Coz its when relations are left on their own to grow the natural balances between 2 people and all aspects of them develop . this is what makes relations so fulfilling and enduring . This is what makes people surrender their egos and rise above their level.
Love or otherwise , there is a constant hurry and pressure that is there with us , to be always and quickly be in relations . May be its the side effect of the economic and social changes . or may be our generation just don’t know how to deal with the unprecedented power that these changes gave them .
The net result is ,we tend to develop relations than let them develop on their own .
And its when such choices are made power equations and practicality over weights the quality of relation , its meaning and that of life is general .
The funniest part is , we all , rather most us do it ….and we all think we don’t .
And then sometime … we wonder .. why doesn’t life sound so great ..
why doesn’t love feel like ecstasy …
the difference ………. my friend is that of masterpiece and mass production .
ps : i aint disparaging the GF/BF culture . In fact i find it very practical … so long ppl keep the definitions clear ..